No one ever wants to admit to themselves they are being emotionally manipulated, especially by someone close.
But the sad truth is, the ones closest to us are the people who are most able to manipulate us emotionally. It’s because we let them so close that we open ourselves up to being taken advantage of.
Now this isn’t always a bad thing, developing close relationships is healthy for everyone, but it is important to know who, and who not to let in.
And if you feel like you may already be close to someone who is trying to emotionally manipulate you, here are a few red flags to help you recognize it.
1. You feel like your energy is drained around them
Manipulators need the attention and energy of others to make themselves feel better. To do so they will make sure everyone around them knows how sad or angry they are with their current situations.
They’ll constantly bring a conversation back around to their stories and woes until you are completely immersed in their problems. This is how they take your energy, and it can make you feel tired.
2. It’s all about them
It’s always about what they want to do, or what they have to say.
Your stories and problems don’t matter. They might listen to you, but as soon as you are done, the conversation is back on them and what they are going through.
And if you try and bring it up, they will make you feel guilty about not listening to them.
3. You feel emotionally unstable
If you’re feeling on edge all the time around someone, like you’re walking on egg shells, it maybe because they are trying to control you.
You’re always scared to say or do the wrong thing, and it bottles up, possibly manifesting in emotionally outbursts of your own.
4. They often use anger or aggression
A manipulator will often use intimidation in the form of abusive language and loud tones of voice when they are uncomfortable, to quickly control a situation.
Instead of dealing with a serious problem you two need to figure out, they will often instead choose to get aggressive and shout or break things.
This sometimes can even lead to physical violence, before it does, either leave the room or house.
Suggest counseling , and if they don’t agree, you may have to make the hard to decision to leave a bad environment.
5. They constantly bring up your insecurities
Even if it’s in a playful or seemingly loving way, an emotional manipulator will constantly bring up the things you are most insecure about it.
They may even take it a step further and go out of their way to constantly make sure you know that they love you despite your insecurities or that they hold the key to keeping you secure about yourself.
6. Your feelings never matter
It doesn’t matter what they do to make you feel sad or mad. Whatever you did that led to that is even worst than how you feel.
For example, if tried to tell them dinner is ready and they yelled at you for disturbing them while on the computer, and made you cried.
They might be even angrier with you for making them feel bad about making you cry, when you were disturbing them in the first place. They’ll spin it how ever they can to make you the one feeling the most guilty.
Do you see any of these signs in any of your relationships?
It may be hard for some of us to admit, or even identify in our close loved ones.
Hopefully these warning signs will help you better see them in those you choose to keep near you.
And help you to know who to keep further away from you.