A gay throuple has made history after all three listed themselves as dads on their son’s birth certificate.
One of the dads, Dr Ian Jenkins, has recounted, in a new book coming out this month, the story of how he met his two partners, Dr Alan Mayfield and Jeremy Hodges, and how they collectively grew their family.
The book, ‘Three Dads and a Baby’ shares their incredible journey through parenthood and is set for release on March 9.
“That our baby, Piper, has three parents is not a big deal. I have three parents myself, which are my father, mother, and stepmother, and nobody deems it extraordinary.
People tend to think it’s all about sex or something or that we’re unstable and are doing crazy things.
But It’s remarkably domestic and ordinary in our home,” Ian Jenkins writes.
The throuple’s love story all started out when Jenkins and Mayfield met while running their medical residencies in Boston. Nine years later, they met their third, Hodges, who works at a zoo hospital. There and then, their love affairs intensified, and, today, they are a proud gay throuple with two adorable kids.
The throuple started deliberating the possibility of becoming parents fiver years after they had been together, and talks about it heightened when some of their friends volunteered to donate their leftover embryos.
A year later, after a whooping $120,000 has been expended on implantations, tests, contracts, and legal fees, the throuple’s dream of fathering a child finally came true.
“Gay couples don’t delve into parenthood by accident. It’s always a well thought act, and it’s complicated,” said Jenkins.
The Journey to Parenthood
The men’s journey to parenthood certainly wasn’t a duck soup, as they first had to get a surrogate mother to carry and deliver their baby, and, thankfully, one of their good friends, Delilah, was there to help.
But the more complicated part is each of the throuple had to process legal adoption for the embryos, just so they could each have equal paternal rights.
Even worse, they faced another challenge as the embryos weren’t viable and, as a result, didn’t implant properly. Therefore, they couldn’t find the help they needed in Delilah.
However, they got back on track when another friend of theirs, Meghan, offered to help. But there was still a challenging legal process.
“We had to have contracts between each woman and each man. Then we realized the contracts had to be redone when another cycle got planned. This cost us $500 per hour in fees, paid to four lawyers, one representing the surrogate mother, and the other three representing each of us. All this just to see that we had a parenting agreement, which no straight couple would probably ever be asked to sign.”
After the long legal proceedings, Alan, Ian, and Jeremy finally won the rights to their ‘poly birth certificate’, just before the birth of their child, Piper.
“Had we not done all that, one of us three parents would be a legal nobody to the kids. No consent for medical care. No right to visitation if we split up. No legal responsibilities. No say in decision making. No automatic inheritance, all of which could be very risky for the family.”
The throuple and their two kids are now thriving as a family, with Jenkins being referred to as Papa, Jeremy as Dad, and Alan as Dada.
Each father plays a role in the house: Alan is said to be better off reading books. Jeremy is deemed the creative dad, and Ian is described as the cook and resident fort-maker.
Funnily, Jerkins claims Piper sees her three fathers as a source of pride and has once bragged to her preschool friends about having three parents, instead of their own two.