Getting your life together

Depending on our day-to-day, we can be exposed to a lot of negativity.

No matter how many other people’s bad moods we are exposed to, at the end of the day we are typically our own worst critic.

We will criticize and mentally punish ourselves for not saying the perfect thing in every conversation;

not finishing all the tasks you set out to complete;

not helping enough; not having the brilliant idea at work; working too much; not working enough;

making something more difficult and then finding an easier way that you feel really silly for not having seen before;

whatever it is, there are a million little things that we will pile the weight on our shoulders and take the blame for not having been or done enough. 

We can brush off angry customers, clients, and strangers with road rage, but it’s hard to brush off our own expectations and disappointments.

To avoid falling down a slippery slope of depression, low self-esteem, and low self-worth, it’s important to remind yourself at the end of each day that you are enough and you did enough.

When you can close your day feeling positive about yourself and your worth, you can start each morning fresh and ready to keep moving forward.

Here are a few tricks to help you feel like enough at the end of each day:

1. You did what you could

There will be days when you didn’t accomplish all that you wanted to.

Life has a way of throwing other tasks and obstacles at us that can derail our concentration or completely alter our day from what we expected.

It’s important, especially when other things unexpectedly pop up, to remind yourself that you did what you could.

It may not have been everything, you may have gotten nothing on your to-do list done because you had to spend your time responding to something else—but you did what you could.

This is a good reminder for both tangible and intangible things.

Your to-do list is easy to see what you could and could not get done, but it’s important to remember that in all situations you did what you could at the time.

You might think of the perfect thing to have said hours or days after the conversation, or you might wish you responded quicker to a situation or done something different to have improved the process or outcome.

Whatever it is that you wish you could change and are feeling like you aren’t enough or didn’t do enough—remind yourself you did what you could at the time.

Hindsight is 20/20, but you did what you could at the time given whatever circumstances you were given.

2.  You love and like yourself

When the little things pile up, and the big things do, too, we can get really hard on ourselves and forget that we love ourselves.

Every choice you make along the way is a building block to who you are.

Times may be tough, you may not like the position you’re in, but if you are happy with who you are as a person; if you’re kind, respectful, caring, and have developed all the traits you believe are fundamental for who you want to be, then remind yourself that you love who you are.

More importantly, remind yourself that you like who you are.

You may not love all the choices you’ve made, you may not like where you find yourself at this moment, but that doesn’t mean you can’t love and like who you are as a person.

If you truly don’t like yourself, if you are genuinely unhappy with who you have become, then tell yourself that you can like yourself, and you love yourself enough to try and make different choices.

3. You’re allowed to make mistakes

This is a big one.

It’s easy to mess up once and carry it around with you for days or longer.

You forgot to check your blind spot and accidentally cut another driver off on your way to work.

You misspoke at work and caused confusion that you had to untangle because you didn’t think it through all the way.

From tiny mistakes to bigger ones, it’s easy to hold every little one over your own head until you either forget about it, or mess up again.

Everyone makes mistakes.

Everyone forgets to look, says the wrong thing, forgets an important deadline, is late to an important event, etc.

We all do it.

You’re allowed to do it, too.

Forgive yourself of the mistakes you make and learn from them instead of holding them over your head and making yourself feel guilty or bad about it.

If you wouldn’t hold it against another person forever, you certainly shouldn’t hold it against yourself.

4. You’re on your own path

You can’t compare yourself to others and expect to see the same results.

Everyone is on their own path and everyone has different experiences, outcomes of those experiences, and internal and external obstacles.

It is unfair for you to compare yourself and your journey to someone else’s.

Even if you are both trying to accomplish the same thing, you’re a different person than they are and will have a different result simply because of that fact.

Remind yourself that it’s okay your life is different from someone else’s.

Your path is yours, and theirs is their own.

Remind yourself of these things every night, not just when you’ve had a hard day.

When you do, you’ll be able to release all the negativity of your day and start fresh.